a lost loved one

Our time this summer was spent at my seesters home. Our home was being raised. My seester doesn't have normal children. that is to say, hers are not human. They are four legged furry critters, but very cute and loveable. She has 5 cats and she had a dog, Zaedah.
This entry is about Zaedah.

Seester has had Zaedah for several years. she found her, or Zaedah found my seester. however ya want to say it, they found each other. Zaedah was a yellow lab, mixed with something else that i cant recall. but that doesn't matter. What matters is how everyone felt about her. There's a sayin, "To know her is to love her". I find that saying very true with Zaedah. All who knew her, loved her. She was loveable, friendly. She didn't bark all the time like most dogs. actually I don't recall her barking ever.

Unfortanitly, Zaedah was diagnosed with her 3rd bout of cancer. We were all sadden by this news. She only had a few short months to live. and they were short. But in that time, we all gave her all the special love we had for her. and extra treats.

Me and my family finally after almost 4 months, moved back into our home. for the following week I made the trip to my seesters house to see pup, my name for her. Took her out for some air, and potty time. (she had a hard time with waiting for my seester to come home). She always got excited when i walked into the house. I guess she missed me. that always made me feel real good, For I had missed her too.

The Sunday after we moved back home, I got a call from seester. She needed my husband's help. Zaedah had passed away around 8 p.m. We immediatly left for my seester's house. As I hugged her and said my goodbye's I couldnt help but be overwhelmed by tears. I tried to hold them back, I always try to stay strong for those who are down. and didnt want to get my seester upset again. But I couldn't help but let them fall. My husband and dad were out back digging for her final resting place. we all helped in burying her. it was our final goodbyes to such a wonderful, loving family member.

Zaeday pup, I love you and miss you terriably. you will always be remembered.

family vacation

our first family vacation this summer. we took a week and went to maryland. stockton maryland. where we stayed with Waynes sister, Laurie and her family. we were all looking forward to it. so much so, that instead of leaving friday morning, we left thursday afternoon.

what a great time we had. a trip to ocean city, shads landing and 2 trips to chincoteague island (i think that was our favorite spot). we went to shads landing to visit my cousins Allen and his family, Joanie and Clara. we enjoyed our time together and a seafood dinner, caught earlier that day. it was great to see them all.

we enjoyed our time spent with Laurie and family. and we all wished that we lived closer. all the children had a great time and asked to stay longer. of course i think one child had other reasons for wanting to stay longer. hehehe.

we are going back halloween weekend for a party that Laurie throws every year. we are looking forward to that too. and maybe next summer we will go back there for vacation. so thank you Laurie, Kevin, Stephanie, Jr and Lorelai for a great vacation. cant wait to see you all again.

proud mommy

being a mom of 4 can sometimes be hectic. like at this time of year when there is so much going on with the school year coming to an end. and realizing that they are growing up, faster than i expected. why didnt it go this fast for me?? i guess to my parents it did, just not to me. and sometimes it amazes me how they have grown and become young adults.

for instance...later today i will be taking amber to the bank to help her open her first account. she is getting a savings account. next week, on her 17th birthday, i am taking her to the dr's. for a physical so she can get her permit and working papers for the summer job she recently got. she will be a junior in high school next year. 17 years went by fast and i am very proud of her accomplishments and the person she is.

then there is kimmie, excuse me, kim. she went to her school formal last night. it was held at a very nice hall. the dance was called the moving up dance, because they are going into high school next year. we bought the dress, got her nails done, and a friend did her hair. she did not look like a 14 year old. more like a beautiful young woman who has grown so fast before my eyes. i waited for her dance to be over inside the hall, it was 11 p.m. and i was tired. but couldn't help but smile when i could hear the music and all the kids singing along to it. (it was "don't stop believing" by journey.) and all of the parents waiting spoke of how they remember that song when they were young. me to. i watched her walk out and give her boyfriend a quick kiss goodnight. ( ahhh, yes on the lips) i manly say ahhh because i can remember her being a little girl who clung to me and followed me everywhere. where did that time go?? i am proud of her as well.

valerie is my 3rd child. she is 11 and in the 5th grade. she was my smallest baby, the princess. now she is grown up to a beautiful young girl who is active in her school. who hasn't missed a day of school in over 2 years. she has lots of friends. and i happen to know there is a boy who has a crush on her. the other day i got a friend request from some one i went to elementary school with. we were val's age in the 5th grade. and it just amazes me i guess that now my daughter is that age. she isnt into all the things my older 2 daughters are. well alomst. but she will get there. i am proud of her too.

last but not least is my little man, joey. i will admit i am having a hard time realizing that even though he is the baby in the family, he is not a baby. he is 9 now and in 3rd grade. well going into 4th shortly. i am trying to stop calling him my baby. be his to big for that. he no longer believes in santa or the easter bunny. and i will again admit that i got misty eyed at that. but he is a big boy now. and even though he isn't dating or going to dances or anything that his big sisters do, he is still growing fast. and im proud of him

anniversary weekend

we didn't go away after we got married. couldn't afford to really. so we wanted to do something for our first anniversary. back in january we talked about going to a bed and breakfast. that didn't work out. a week or so before our anniversary wayne said, lets take a day trip to seaside. sounds good. except lets stay the night. even better. leave saturday morning come back sunday afternoon.

so our journey begins. we leave saturday at 8 a.m. wayne says we should be there by 9:30. yea ok. he says he knows several ways to get there. uh huh. i believe we got there around 10:30 or 11. apparently he made a left when he should of made a right. he didn't realize it til we saw all the freehold signs. oops, he says, this isn't right. we must be lost. we need a g.p.s. so i say lets pull in and get breakfast and ask for directions. oh i dont need directions he says. {i believe all husbands say that}. we pull into a burger king. while he went to the bathroom, i ask for directions. making sure i point out that my husband got us lost.

naturally we made it to our destination. and wayne says we were sight seeing. and oh the sights we did see.....

i do not recall what town we were in, but i've renamed it. "The Land of the Wondering Jewish People". mind you that i am not prejudice. but we both had a good laugh. for several miles, all you could see, were people walking around in their dress clothes. not unusual i know, but it was the men who had us going huh??? some had the traditional hats and clothes. others had some sort of shawl, while others, and mostly the men who were a bit larger, wore these furry hats. those i dubbed the russian jewish people. cuz that's what the hats reminded me of. now naturally we thought they were all going to their church or some sort of function. except that we only saw 1 church and they were going in all different directions. again, i dont normally make fun of peoples cultures. however, this was strange. and we had to pass threw this area twice. remember we got lost.

we had a great time on our trip, we plan on making it a yearly thing. except the getting lost part. we are sore from all the walking on the boardwalk. legs and feet mostly. but it was worth it. cant wait to go back. to the Wondering Jewish People. hope you all enjoyed what ever adventure you's were all on.

childhood innosence

as you all know i am a mother of 4 great kids. 3 of which have long gave up believing in santa or the easter bunny. which didn't quite effect me in a bad way. all part of grokwing up. however, the last one will. my son, who is 9, still believes, for now. he had questioned santa last year to us. me panic stricken asked him what he believes. he said he still believes in santa. whew. my response was, then he is real. was that my opprotunity to tell the truth?? probably. but the thought of crushing his childhood beliefs was not setting well with me. i remember years ago while attending a gathering for christmas eve. uncle joe always played santa. one year his beard was falling down. aunt sis {uncle joe's wife} said "hon, fix your beard". ahhh. i nugged her and she looked mortified. opps she said. naturally my older 2 girls heard. and did i get ther questions when we got home.

today is easter. and joey has not came with questions about the easter bunny. relief. i actually was up at mid-night, putting the basket's together wondering if this will be his last year to believe in them. the magical beings who bring toys and candy to him. does this bother me. yes it does. i realize part of growing up is to stop believing. but, he is my youngest and last child to help him believe. and its coming to an end. i love playing santa and the easter bunny. sometimes growing up is no fun.

well if this is the last year, i've had fun. but then again, if i continue to get up in the middle of the night to place present under our tree and put baskets on the table, then santa and the easter bunny is still alive.

OH NO A NEW TOY!!!!!!!

one evening my darling husband comes home and informs me that he aquired a new toy for the kids. and when i say kids, that means him too. he continues to say it is in the back of his jeep. o.k. not something to big, right. wrong. we have to put it together. so what is it you ask..........




yup, a trampoline. already i'm worried. not over the kids being hurt mind you. but my other kid, otherwise known as my husband. the children are pros on a trampoline. their grandparents have one and their there every week during the summer. plus a neighbor had one. now wayne has been on one before. he likes to pretend he is a child and thinks his body is limber enough to do these things. like stepsledding and man hunt. last time he was on a trampoline he fell off and hurt his back and didn't want the kids to get me cuz he thought i would get mad at him. see another kid.

so now we have this trampoline up in the yard. and he has been on it. he wants to do stunts like the kids so. however their stunts are flips and things. his idea was to get on the roof of shed, jump off onto trampoline and bounce high enough to clear the fence. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. needless to say i will stock up on my first aid supplies, keep 911 programed on my phone and get a life insurance policy on him.

getting older... i mean.. growing up.

"Getting older ain't for sissy's" says my dad. "Just wait til your my age" says my mom. "never" says me. I swore along time ago that there were certain things my parents said to me that i wouldn't say to my children. Oh well, i've said them. especially the wait til your my age. or wait til you have kids. Years ago, and i mean about 20 years ago, i didn't mine getting older. my early teen years were rough. and i hated school. so naturally i couldn't wait til i was out of my teens. then the 20's. 3 out of 4 kids were born. that was good. bad marriage, not so good. so i didn't mind turning 30. I had my last child when i was 30. that was good. ending bad marriage was good too. realizing a marriage ends never sits well even if you wanted it to end. you tend to wonder if you can raise the children as a single parent. and what will the future hold. but i can honestly say, the future got brighter. and with the help of my parents, the child raising went pretty smooth. Thanks mom and dad. late 30's met my wonderful husband, wayne. that was good. now i'm a year away from 40. and i'm not really looking forward to it.
I used to shake my head at my parents when they would talk of the aches and pains of "getting older". now it's my turn. and i'm sure my kids shake their heads at me.

I always thought that certain ailments were for women who were in their 50's. WRONG. almost a year ago, i started having nightsweats and hot flashes. WHAT IS THIS. 38 and menopause??? no way!! looked up symptoms of menopause. yes way. on the bright side.... like there's a bright side, better to get it over with. then a friend say's she's been going through it for 4 years or so. YUCK. then i read women can suffer for 10 years. NOOOOOOO!!!!!! sorry to say this is a part of life i cant do anything about. Mom says since she's been through menopause she doesn't have to shave her legs. Hmmmmm, there's a pro to this. no more shaving my legs. I can deal with that. and i've noticed, that i'm not shaving them as often. not because i feel lazy, who wants to shave every other day. it's because, not much there. now it's once every 2 weeks. the only other pro is, eventually, no more monthly visit's.

yesterday, i was talking to my cousin. and as she would brag, she's younger than me. by 10 months. and she is starting to go through menopause too. we trained stories of being hot one minute and cold the next. and i told her how i wake up in the middle of the night laying in a puddle. time to get the towel. and the other pain of this, which wayne hates as well. achy boobs. that needs to go away real soon. Then my cousin mention the other problem she's having. it's called the Mansfield Curse. and only the women in my family suffer from it. although i'm sure many women in the world have a similar curse. The Mansfield Curse is when us Mansfield women get older we expand. not it height {sorry mom and Amy} but width. our mid-section balloons out. and there's nothing you can do to stop it. anyway, my cousin complained that she's gaining weight. ( last i saw her, a couple months ago, she was a rail) actually, come to think of it she always was. quit complaining Heidi. she says her thighs and hips have added some weight. now most people would say, since she's so thin, your finally getting curves. BUT, me and her both know, it's the Mansfield Curse. hahahaha. oh, wait, Mansfield blood runs in my veins too. ugh. that would explain why my hips have grown a bit too. double ugh. I guess by the time we turn 50, we will look like our aunts. Which we used to laugh and say "look how big they are. Sorry Aunt Helen and Aunt Madeline. They couldn't help that they were cursed. They were Mansfield's after all.

I also always prided myself that i didn't have gray hair. my little sister {loving known as seester} has more gray than me. so does that same cousin who is 10 months younger than me. hahaha. the occasional strain would show up in mine. no big deal. until today. when my 11 year old daughter {who likes to brush my hair} says she found a couple. what??? and she's counting them. ok valerie, that's enough counting. wait til your my age.

to sum this up. getting old aint for sissies. however, i've decided today that i'm not getting old. i'm just growing up still. after all, i'm still young at heart.